What is this exactly? A mom who has two children in a relative succession. Irish-ish twins if you will. Raising two babies (15 months apart) is…work. It’s work. It’s also an adventure, it’s amazing, it’s a lot of love and grace, and it’s fun. And work.
OK, total digression here- anyone who has twins or two small children-or any amount of children and you work hard to take carae of them-you are a SAINT. For my wonderful friends who have 3 or more, your title of sainthood will be expedited immediately. I’m talking to you Nakia of the amazing Purefoy Family!
There is this initial fear you have when you have a baby and you are having a baby.
Will I Love this one less?
How am I going to do this?
Will I be good enough of a mother for my kids?
How many packs of baby wipes will we now go through in a month (about 10 in case you were wondering)?
Honestly, the biggest thought I had was BUT I’M STILL A FIRST TIME MOM! MY ‘oldest’ (and I use the term loosely) son was 15 months to the day his brother was born. We barley finish celebrating his first birthday. I still feel like a first time mom, in a way a first time second time mom.
You have this bit if sadness that your little one is not going to be on their own anymore- my son was 15 months old to the day when his brother was born. After my emergency c-section there was a long 5 minutes where I heard my son, but did not see him, when I did my husband put his little face to mine and I just had this immense peace. He was safe (a few cuts but ok) and alive. I had peace knowing what was going to come next. I slept most of that next day, and so did my son. There is something that happens when you give birth the second time that you know what to do, those instincts kick in and it’s like riding a bike (muscle memory). When I got home I realized my bike also had a pogo stick on it. There is this dichotomy of peace and quiet chaos-the unknown of toddlerhood and walking through those steps as well as experiencing the new born stages of a fresh baby. You know, but you don’t know. You have peace, but are still nervous. The reality that you use at least a pack of week of baby wipes kicks in.
You start to become more resourceful, more imaginative and if possible, taking yourself way less seriously than you did before. I have about 6-10 voices I use to entertain my kids daily, dancing is a constant, and my gym membership hit the bricks a long time ago because carrying both kids at once is an Olympic skill.
You also should get used to ‘the look’ people give you when you tell them how old your kids are. The looks can range too. Some are amazement, confusion like how is it possible you had two kids in so short a time (try not to roll your eyes).
The look of pity (again, try really hard not to roll your eyes)
I was laughed at in my face once.
My personal favorite is when people ask me if they are twins. OK, this is not an eye rolling moment, but try really hard to not stare back at the person like they have something wrong with them for thinking that your toddler and infant are THE SAME AGE.
But all in all, you just get used to having two kids. IT’s like how you got used to having one. I couldn’t image life without my spunky, imaginative Big Boy, and my sweet, cuddly, docile little boy. Currently, they are both small, don’t talk and cry when you leave the room-who else is going to love you like that? 😉
So in a few years when people ask me if they are twins, I’ll just smile and say they are a year apart.
You are not alone and you have me and plenty of other moms in the same boat cheering you on!
So, new to two mommas can you do this?s
YES, YOU CAN!
YES, YOU CAN!
YES, WE CAN!
Until next time!